Today I did something that I did exactly 7 years ago for the first time. I did it last year at about this time, too but it's the time 7 years ago that is really resonating with me.
On January 6, 2004, Marc and I sat in a doctor's office with a blank VHS (what, they still did VHS only 7 years ago?) in our hands. An ultrasound tech popped the tape into her machine, I laid down on the exam table, lifted my pink sweater up to expose my bulging belly, and stared at the screen as she rolled the wand over my lubed up skin to check for all the right parts. She found them, announced to us that we were having a boy, and then told me there was a mass on the outside of my uterus. Then, we were ushered into an exam room where Dr. Berry came in to discuss my health, not the baby's. As it turned out I had a fibroid, but before we came to that conclusion, I spent 2 weeks getting MRIs, seeing specialists, and thinking I might lose my first child, die myself, and/or never have more children again. Oh yes, those were good times.
Today I scheduled my ultrasound. On January 5, 2011, Marc and I will be sitting in a [different] doctor's office with 3 boys in tow. I will lay down on the exam table, lift up my shirt to expose my bulging belly, stare at the screen while she rolls the wand over my lubed up skin to check for all the right parts. She'll find them and probably announce that in fact it is another boy. We'll have to wait and see on that though. I can't help but be a little nervous--the feelings of that cold day in January 7 years ago will never be forgotten and the dates seem a little too coincidental. Yes, we've been down this road before, this exact road before. Carter's birthday and due date for #4 are just days away from each other.
Other thoughts I have frequently:
*Why oh why do I have to be pregnant 2 Christmases in a row? I hate not feeling like myself during the holidays.
*I didn't even have a chance to get used to being a mom of 3. Now #4 is on the way and while I feel in control today, I certainly don't feel like that everyday and come June I probably won't be feeling that at all.
*If you think you are surprised, imagine how we feel.
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19 comments:
WOW!!!! You must be surprised! Very exciting though!! Congrats!
Surprise! I am happy for you. I really, truly wish my kids were closer together-- although some things are out of our control. It will be so much fun when everyone is older and easier. Congrats! Call me for support if you need it, I'll talk you into being excited!!
Congrats! And good luck :) I think it's time for a cute little girl.
Wow! I haven't been a part of the blogging world for quite some time and I'm so glad that I checked today! Congratulations! If anyone can do it you can!! (I'll send lots of good thoughts and energy your way!)
But you make the cutest babies!!! So congrats!! I'm a bit jealous, 4 kids is just what I wanted! I can be your on-call babysitter so that my baby hunger will go away! Hope you're feeling good!
I am excited for you... and who knows maybe the "curse" of boys will be broken with this one and it will be a girl? :)
I am excited for you, although I know you are feeling all sorts of different emotions right now. Look to the future and all the fun you will have. It will go fast...
Congratulations! My heart is full of love for you and I wish I could give you a big hug. I know those emotions so well...happy to have a tiny babe yet terrified at the prospect as well. I often repeat the words of Elder Wirthlin, "Come what may and love it."
Congratulations!!! WOW! You are superMOM!
Oh, what to say? Congrats. It really is a wonderful thing. Truly wonderful. But I understand the trepidation. Our #4 will be born just 3 years 4 mo after our #1. It is overwhelming and most days I just try not to think about it too hard or I cry. I DON"T feel in control of three, so four seems impossible. However, you are amazing and any child that comes to your family is extremely lucky. It really will be fun to look back and see them all so close together. God knows us so much better than we know ourselves. He will make up for anything we might lack. Man, I wish we talked more. I miss you.
Congrats! How are you feeling?
First reaction: Holy Crap!
Second reaction: Congratulations! Although it's a suprise, it's something to celebrate! No doubt you'll be blessed!
Congrats on the exciting news! I really liked your post about the emotions of the day...we have all felt like that before...and it is always so nice to just read it from someone else's perspective.
Are you feeling sick at all?
A HUGE CONGRATS from Tyler and me!! We think it's wonderful that you are expecting #4. What a blessing for your kids to be so close in age. You will do great, girl!! I can't wait to hear what you're having. :) Miss you guys!
What an exciting surprise! Congrats!
You will be an awesome 4 kid mama. You will also {as I do EVERY time I leave the house} have lots of strangers exclaim "Oh, my, you have your hands full." And you will look them in the eye, and say, "I know! Isn't it great!?" And flash them a huge smile, because it really, truly IS great! Congrats!!!
what a lucky sweet baby- congrats and enjoy the miracles of Christmas :) I have been prego two Christmases in a row two- it makes it all the more magical
Congrats, dear Diana! Your boys are so gorgeous. Good luck with everything. Miss you!
So I'm reading along and wondering what you are talking about. Then I finally figure out "ANOTHER BEAUTIFUL PHILLIPS BABY!" Oh, I am so happy! Ike will be thrilled! Yay! I dare you to look at that beautiful picture of Christian and tell me the world isn't lucky to get another one of those!
Yay!
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